The "Can't Wait Code" you need to get on your calendar
You'll be screaming "Hot Diggity" by the end of the week
One of my friends and I were talking this morning about the cognitive dissonance of this moment - we’re worrying about whether our kids’ blood is starting to run blue from their daily diet of Takis while living under a barrage of daily, unprecedented government actions.
And, it highlighted what has been a struggle for me for months (years really, if I’m being honest). How can I talk about joy when it feels like everything is falling apart? Is it selfish to focus on building a life that lights you up when so many people are struggling?
Our chat, though, helped me realize: My job isn’t to help you with political part.
There are so many other, much more qualified people than me out there, that you should listen to and follow.*
But, I can help you with the life part. 🎉
Because, I believe, no matter what is going on in the world, you still deserve to be your best self. You deserve to have a connected, joyful life that lights you up and fills you up.
I’d even go so far as to say the world needs it!
Right now, the last thing we all need is more grumpy, unfulfilled, unsatisfied people, am I right?
Instead, we need people who have energy, who feel lit up from the inside, who walk through the world with optimism and joy. We need people who can change the air in the room with their energy and enthusiasm.
We need people who have the bandwidth to take action and make things happen.
I’m going to give you one of my favorite examples of why you showing up as your most lit up self matters.
Scenario #1: It’s your birthday and you love your birthday.
You get up and are feeling outstanding (it’s your birthday!) so when the kids start bickering over whose turn it is to feed the dog, you handle it with grace and everyone settles down quickly. The car ride to drop off is filled with a Taylor Swift sing-along and when you get to school the kids hop out, feeling filled up.
You decide to get a coffee so head into your local shop and are smiley and chatty with the barista so they give you a free, birthday latte. Birthdays are the best!
As you’re leaving, you hold the door for the guy behind you who thanks you and you have a quick chit chat about the weather on the way to the car. You leave thinking - wow, the world is such a friendly place!
And because you feel that way, you let people in on your drive home, you give your partner grace when they snap, circumventing a fight, and you tip the delivery gal extra because you have empathy for what a hard job they’re doing.
You change the energy of every space you walk through in subtle, but important ways.
You literally make the world a better place.
Scenario #2: It’s a normal day and life sucks.
You get up and are exhausted so when the kids start bickering, you yell at them and everyone goes silent and you start beating yourself up about your parenting. But then they start up again and it’s too much so you start yelling again. The car ride is silent and when the kids get out, they slam the door without saying good bye.
You’re feeling crappy so decide to get a coffee but the barista doesn’t hear your order right and you snap at them because all you want is a little caffeine, for god’s sake. They give you a stony look. As you walk out, you don’t notice the guy behind you so the door closes in his face and he gives you a dirty look on his way to the car.
As you drive home, several people cut you off, your partner snaps at you and, because you’re at your end, it ends up in an hour long screaming match, and your dinner delivery takes forever so you barely tip.
Is this scenario a little dramatic? Yes. Is it also true? Also, yes.
How you walk through the world has consequences. If you’re filled up and feeling good, you literally change the energy around you. And the opposite is also true.
So, it actually DOES matter if you’re feeling joyful and connected. It matters to all of us if you take the time to put yourself first - to take care of yourself - because if you don’t we all suffer. (I’m feeling extra over-the-top today, but IT’S ALSO TRUE!)
We need you lit up. We need you taking care of yourself. We need you functioning from a filled up space. We want you to have the bandwidth to roll with life’s punches.
Have I convinced you yet that this is VERY IMPORTANT!??!?!
Omg, get to this week’s challenge already, woman, will ya? 😂
Get an event on the calendar that you - yes, you! - CAN’T WAIT to do!
Notice I didn’t say “your family”, or “your kids”, or “your neighbor Carol down the street who has the lovely garden".” This is about YOU!
We’re looking for a calendar event that makes you think “HOT DIGGITY!” There shouldn’t be any dread or feeling like you “have to”, okay?
I’ve gone back and forth all week on whether or not I should make this task easier and less time-consuming (like do x for ten minutes, once this week).
But, it comes down to this: I want you to realllllly luxuriate in how life-changing it feels to carve out time for yourself for no reason other than that it will make you happy.
Will it take a little effort and planning? Yes.
Will you maybe have to turn on a movie for the kids to give yourself some space? Maybe.
Will other people have to hop in and help you out so you prioritize yourself? Sure.
IS IT WORTH IT? YES IT IS.
A lot of time when I ask moms to come up a fun idea, they get stuck because their joy muscle is so out of shape. Read through this list and pick the one that gives you a little zing and then DO IT! 🥳
What about?
scheduling a massage or facial
buying tickets to a concert, play, museum, sporting event
sleeping in until you naturally wake up
reading a book or watching movies for an afternoon
making plans with a friend who makes you laugh
going to dinner with a couple who makes you and your partner funnier
sitting at your computer for a morning to write or work on your dream business
wandering around a downtown area, farmers market, or mall without an agenda
going to a movie that YOU want to see
getting an ice cream and sitting on a bench to people watch
putting a blanket down in the park and listening to your favorite playlist
baking a pie or cake or something that feels special
trying out the restaurant or coffee shop that you keep hearing about
WHAT DID I MISS?
I mentioned last week that I’m dying to see “Materialists” because rom coms feed my soul (and I haven’t been to a real movie in a real theater since last summer’s “Thelma”!) So, I’m going to make either my sisters go with me one evening or plan a solo date.
Are you on board? Can I get you to check “yes’ on this one and get one afternoon / morning / hour scheduled on your calendar so you can start walking through the world again with a bounce in your step?
It’s for the good of humanity so LET’S DO THIS THING!
Comment below with you’re planning to do so we can support you! I can feel the world’s energy shifting already!
Here’s to an excellent week with pockets of joy and love!
xx. Kara
*A few of the people that I recommend: Jessica Yellin (duh), Sharon McMahon (double duh), Heather Cox Richardson (triple duh), Pant Suit Politics (4 x duh), and Emily Amick (duh to infinity). They will keep you sane and informed!